There’s a Lot to Learn from Boehner

If I just immigrated to the US, didn’t speak English and turned on CNN I’d think John Boehner was the President. The man is unyielding no matter how ridiculous his positions are and beats you to death with the same few catch phrases in every speech. He’s Benjamin Netanyahu (Why don’t you click your “indefensible” borders three times and go back to Palestine?) if he were struck by lightning.

Barack Obama is our President but Boenher has literally deboed the bully pulpit. No matter how many times he repeats, “Job creators”, “We won’t raise taxes”, or my favorite, “The American people,” he doesn’t get more convincing.

Except to Obama apparently. Boehner has him leaning to the right like an old school Mike Tyson fight.

There’s something admirable about Boehner’s determination. How he can say, “The American people” want to give more money to “job creators” who are already sitting on $1.9 trillion with a straight face (Maybe it’s just fried up that way) is impressive.

To put it bluntly, the man has talent. It’s a talent for BSing but it’s a talent nonetheless.

Boehner is beating down the man that hypnotized a nation with “Yes We Can.” It takes huge balls (Probably a side effect from the grow lamp he must sleep under) to out BS the man that ordered the murder of Osama bin Laden, threw his body in the sea and said he wouldn’t release the evidence out of respect for terrorists.

You’d swear Boehner was taking notes from Big Tobacco the way he sticks to the script. Oh wait, they are his biggest campaign supporters.

Shoddy politics aside, Boehner is a great example of using all the tools at your disposal to your advantage. He’s relentless with his sound bites and knows that no matter what ideological slant a news station may appear to have, they’re all owned by wealthy people or as Boehner would call them, “job creators” (They sure make his easier). These stations will always be willing to give him air time to not so subtly jab you with the same tired catch phrases.

He’s the political equivalent of Taco Bell commercials at midnight, with even more filler.

The lesson for Obama, or any third party candidate (It’s about time we got out if two party conspiracy, I mean system) is that revolutionary techniques do work. If you can control the propaganda you can mobilize the people.

Obama won the presidency on a pseudo-populist platform and has since retreated to fight with Republicans on their terms. If you want to fight for the majority of Americans, the mass media is not your friend. You’ll find yourself isolated against an endless flow of conservative voices under the guise of “objectivity.”

Presumably, the debt ceiling debate has ended and the majority of American people are looking to take another L. Obama must bring a gang mentality to the bully pulpit and give these people more visibility.

Otherwise it’ll be more of the same from the orange enema of the state.